Controlling Your Mental Traffic
Many know what it’s like to brave a morning commute. When sitting in a sea of standstill traffic, it can be difficult not to question whether everyone is truly doing their part on the road to keep us all moving steady. If someone merges too quickly and causes another to hit the brakes, the ripple effect can last for a mile. If there is an accident, a lane of individuals a little too interested in the situation can bring progress to a crawl. If everyone were to focus on doing the best they could in the moment to follow the rules of the road and be a courteous driver, traffic would flow, tensions would ease and commuters would clock in on time.
While this fantasy of perfectly efficient (and courteous) driving may be a fairy tale, seeing our challenges as cars on the road can help compartmentalize the issues that need resolving in our lives and inspire solutions for how to tackle them.
Stay In Your Lane
There is so much going on in our world. Not just on a global scale, but in our very own communities. These personal connections and investments that we have for our neighborhoods can sometimes feel like overarching distractions that cloud our sense of security. Feeling safe where we live is a huge mental weight and, when that is threatened, we may not be able to focus on much else.
A solution could be to remember to keep our eyes on the road ahead when we are feeling distracted by those outward worries. There is only so much we can do at a time, and the health and safety of ourselves and our immediate families is paramount when our wellness is already spread thin. It is okay to disconnect. It is okay to take a break from local news or municipal advocacy. It is healthy to prioritize yourself before trying to give to the projects around you.
Knowing Your Exits
Making our own reprives in the midst of responsibility is the cornerstone of mental wellness. No one is going to come and give us permission to stop. We have to be our own best advocate and take the time we need when we need it.
Setting up our “exits” in advance means knowing there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Whether that be an evening to ourselves with our favorite implements of self-care or a planned dinner, making time for disconnecting is important.
Not every relaxing moment has to be an elaborate vacation, however. Even the moments in the middle of the day we can spend on ourselves help with not feeling like the line of cars in front of us has no end. Our lunch breaks are OURS to relax in ways that are lasting for the rest of our day. A fifteen-minute walk in the sunshine after sitting at our desks all morning can greatly alter our disposition. A chocolate treat packed with our healthy lunch can make us smile and feel the release we need to keep going.
The kind of breaks we take during this time also make a difference. Psychology researchers Kim, Park and Niu in their study of the benefits of micro breaks from work found that the activity we perform while disconnecting affects how well we handle stress.
While it was no surprise that “relaxation and social activities reduced the effects of work demands on end-of-workday negative affect”, researchers were surprised to find that “cognitive activities aggravated the effects of work demands on negative affect”. People who engaged in more rigorous mental activities that stretched their ability (like math for someone not numbers minded or language learning and a very beginner stage” actually did not feel the benefit of disconnecting from work. They still suffered from irritability and stress once they were home.
The Journey and the Destination
Our mental wellness is a continuous journey, and taking the time to make the ride enjoyable means practicing consistent self-care along the way. By focusing on the things we can control at the moment, we empower ourselves to make our own space and protect our energy. Then, by practicing true disengagement and relaxation, we put our minds at rest for a moment, allowing ourselves to start again from a place of peace. Let’s focus on our wellness and put our health in the driver's seat of our lives today!
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